Music

Original Post Date : November 10, 2005

What is the meaning of music for you? Does it make or break your day?..

Music means a lot to me, in a flowery way, it decorates my life (huayahhh mana tahan…). It’s able to upgrade my happiness into very happy and sadness into the end of the world kind of sadness. Sometimes sad songs make me sad even though I’m in happy screen saver mode. It’s that power.

I’m not a musical person. Of course, I like to picture me wearing long black gown, with long long hair and play violin while everyone got carried away. Cool hah… …mhahaha.. too bad, the only musical instrument I could play is harmonica. Honestly, girls don’t look good or posh blowing harmonica huehhehehe… and to be able to play it, you need only half an hour to learn. I have guitar, Hubby’s friend gave it to me when he knew I wanted to learn guitar. But it ended up behind my couch…maybe put it in my next year resolution..

Anyway, I’m sure even the most unmusical person in the world has some soundtracks in their life.
Soundtracks, such as the songs that remind you for specific thing in our life or specific someone, or some of the lyrics just blow you away. IMO, heartbroken lyrics are the most powerful of all, it tears, breaks and puts some Tabasco in the broken heart. Ouch.

Not only lyrics, but the melody or instrumental could manipulate emotion too. Once, after haven’t been crying for years, I koblo koblo when I heard a wedding song. No, not because some unwanted or heartbroken marriage, but because I had such kuping pangsit that I didn’t hear the lyrics clearly. I though it was a sad song, indeed it was Hawaiian Wedding Song by Andy Williams. Mhahahha….
I shall not meet anyone who read this after..

It was one fine night, everything was ok, college was fine, I didn’t have a fight with bf or anyone, I had my dinner and I was not in debt of course. Maybe I was lonely, and when I heard that song, strangely it sounded sooo sad that out of nowhere, I started to menjiwai....doooh

Guess I was sad, feeling insecure, those might have piled up all along broke it through. It might be just a moment of emotion, but I thought differently after that, it made me realize something.

There are songs that remind me of some guys, friends, places or activities that I had done. The Christmas Song always remind me of one weekend in remote beach called Malingping (ada pingnya seh huhahhaha) while the resort was so cozy, homy and everything was like Christmas, although I wasn’t there for Christmas. There are songs I used to sing terribly with my friends, remind me of them of course, songs that I used to hear until the cassette was broken cause it’s the only cassette I brought when I went for that journey, remind me of the place and the trip, songs with lyric jussst exactly saying about what I feel about this person, remind me of the person.

And, or songs which have special story behind. It doesn’t have to be good, great, masterpiece; even the worst song in the world might mean something for somebody. Heard a Chinese opera song, horrible, but changed my opinion after a grandpa with teary eyes told me that it reminded him of his spouse. Once, I had this best friend and we went out in the group together. In a cassette shop, there was a song playing, and he stood in front of the cassette rack with dreamy eyes.

“Nice song it is.” I was tempted when I saw how ‘deep’ his face was,” Remember someone special?”
He took deep breath, still locked his eyes on the cassette.
“There is this girl, I just don’t know how to let her know.”
He stood there for a good few minutes and decided to buy the cassette for her.
Few days later, I received it and so did the magic words.

We didn’t end up together. I just always regretted why I gave him another reason rather than be honest that I couldn’t picture something more between us.

Since then, whenever I hear the song, I always feel guilty. But, he is still and always be my best guy friend ever. Hhhh…if only I could speak as easy as I could write..

So, anyway, picture says a thousand words. Music says tenth thousand more.

In a while, there would be Christmas song everywhere, and those twinkling instrumental from the tree, too bad there are no longer singing cards hehhehe…I love those twinkling cards! Bought a box of ginger cookies two years ago just because I could spin the box and let the music out. Well, ops…it’s spoilt now, …but the ginger cookies are still inside I guess.

Emm…cookies anyone?


Wehee….! Holiday is finally here for me!!